Dear Gloria…#100DaysOfOldDays

Day 30 #100DaysOfOldDays

If there’s one thing I feel that children of the digital age have really missed out on; it’s the practice of writing letters to friends and pen pals. Paper and ink letters! Some kids do I’m sure, but it’s uncommon. It was lovely to see Little Miss Ten and her friends giving it a go during lockdown

Today, we can communicate with people all over the world, video chat and all that. It’s great, yes it is, but it’s absolutely not the same thing as handwriting a letter. Some people might disagree with me—like my husband who hates writing—but I rank letter writing way above texting or phoning someone.

I came across a bag of my old letters this morning. I spent a couple of hours looking through them. Laughing at some, as they brought back memories of fun times. No way would you ever get the same pleasure from scrolling through a friend’s social media posts, or the WhatsApp group.

A letter was personal. It was written just for you. While a social media post can bring back memories, it wasn’t written especially for you.

The first letter I wrote was in 1978. I was going on eleven. I said to my Dad, I want to write a letter to someone. Who can I write to? He told me to write to my cousin Louise who lived in England. We were the same age and he figured we’d have lots to write about. He was right about that. We got to know each other through our letters, and became close friends and faithful cousins because of it.

Many of the letters from Louise came from Bahrain when she was a cabin crew member for Gulf Air. A lot of the time her letters were written on hotel room writing paper.

Then she worked for British Airways and travelled the world. She had so many adventures that she shared with me in her letters. I envied her life. But I loved her more than I envied her. Still do!  

Alas, the letters dwindled as technology took over until eventually we wrote no more. Nowadays we communicate via WhatsApp and Facebook. All of which has many advantages too—I’m not complaining!

I have letters here from pen pals from Singapore, New Zealand, Wisconsin, UK, Scotland, Donegal and Belfast.  All very polite and innocent, filled with news of school and holiday adventures.

I’ve letters from friends who had lived abroad at the time, some who still do.

Reading through some of these letters has given me such a laugh, and heart-warming memories. They’re filled with all sorts of fun and devilment. Because we knew each other inside out, our writing knew no filters.

Without mentioning any names.

One particular friend wrote me all about her bad day and the job interview she HAD to get to.

It was 1989 and as she was getting ready to go for her interview, she realised that her new tights were not tights at all; they were stockings. Now an Irish girl from the country who had just arrived in London had yet to build up the courage to go shopping for lingerie. It was a rare thing for a lass from rural Ireland to own a pair of suspender belts back then. But she always carried safety pins!

She had no choice but to pin the stockings to her undies.

As she walked to the train station, her undies kept falling down and she had to keep pulling them up.

At the train station there was no one selling tickets and she got more stressed. She decided to risk getting on the train without a ticket and hoped the inspector wouldn’t catch her. She had a job interview to attend!

As she was getting onto the train, her shoe came off and fell onto the tracks, so she had to jump off again. When the train pulled away she jumped down to retrieve her shoe, praying that as she bent down, no one would notice the stockings pinned to her underwear. Needless to say she didn’t make the interview. But she got to go to an Elton John concert in Wembley and I was very jealous!

Another friend wrote that she heard Bridie had a new fella. She had only one question—“Does he have a car?”      

One friend didn’t date her letter, but she did put, ‘Tuesday evening at 7.00 O’Clock.’

After four lines she wrote, ‘I’m finishing for a minute because Eastenders has just started.’

Then she comes back with, ‘Well, I didn’t think much of that.’

Then there’s the friend who told me in secret that she had moved into a flat with her boyfriend. I wasn’t to dare tell anyone. That was in 1985 and living with your boyfriend was frowned upon. (It might even have been a sin.)

Another friend wrote as she sat in hospital waiting on her maternity check-up. I got told about the urine sample she was about to give, and the blood sample. Buying the very basics for the baby, a Moses basket for it to sleep in, and the price of a brand new buggy in Mothercare—£129.

How times have changed!  

£100 per week to rent a flat in London, but they got one cheaper and nicer for £60.

Bought a peach suede puffball skirt (with studs in it) and a jacket to match for a wedding. All for £21.

Boyfriend is buying me a gold bracelet and taking me to a posh restaurant for my birthday (but he doesn’t know it yet)

One friend—the one who was crazy—told me she was joining the Police. Well that didn’t happen!

My friend in New York wrote about all the people from home who she met up with. Her job as a waitress, her boss who was fond of the drink, and his nosey wife who asked questions a feckin Guard wouldn’t ask ya. She lives in a three-bedroom apartment with eight other people. Bodies everywhere, she said.

The crazy friend who thought she’d get into the Police fell down the stairs at a house party and was in agony for days afterwards, but thought it was great craic altogether. And she met two old school friends in a pub in Ealing and they were wearing their wellies.

‘Remember the time we drank the poitín,’ she reminded me. Then she wrote, ‘If you see Sister Patricia, tell her I was asking for her.’ No doubt Sister Patricia missed her so much and cried her eyes out when she left town. Mmm…..

The Grand Creteboom #100DaysOfOldDays PPAC 39

Day 29 #100DaysOfOldDays

Today’s post is also for Marsha Ingrao’s PPAC #39

The SS Creteboom sits derelict on the sandbank of the river between The Quay and Belleek Woods in Ballina, Co Mayo.

The Creteboom in Ballina

In 1917 during WW1, when the British were experiencing a shortage in steel, a project was undertaken to build a fleet of ships out of concrete (rather than steel) to transport iron-ore from Spain to Britain.

Financial problems and lack of manpower held up the project, and when the war ended in 1918, so did the initiative. But work continued on the ships that had been almost completed, and the last of the fleet of 52 barges and 12 tugboats was launched in 1920.

The fleet was never used for it’s intended purpose. London based ship company, Stelp & Leighton bought the fleet and set up the Crete Shipping Company in Sunderland. For two years they used the ships to tow coal to the continent. When the company closed down in 1924, the fleet was left mothballed on the Tyne.

The Creteboom was laid up on the River Ware, then later sold to South Stockton Shipbreaking Company. It was dismantled and stripped bare until all that remained was the concrete.

The Ballina Harbour Commissioners bought the Creteboom, among other shipwrecks, to sink them at the entrance to the river Moy to form a sand barrier. The ship had sustained damage during the crossing from England to Ireland, and it had started to let in water. The Ballina Fire Brigade pumped it but the water continued to flow in. The Harbourmaster ordered it to be removed from the Jetty and it was towed to mid-stream where it sat for forty years.

The Moy Fishery Company feared that the sand barrier plan would interfere with the run of Salmon into the river. They threatened legal action, and the plan was put on hold. But the project was abandoned completely in 1939 when WW2 broke out. The SS Creteboom was moved to its current location in 1974; on the river Moy between Ballina Quay and Belleek Woods.

SS CreteboomGrand and Extraordinary

Its striking presence continues to fascinate tourists and still draws the attention of those who have seen it a hundred times before.

Lucy’s drawing of the Creteboom.

The Discos in the Hall #100DaysOfOldDays

Day 28 #100DaysOfOldDays

Once you reached fourteen, you were allowed out to the disco in the Community Centre. Compared to the youngsters nowadays, it didn’t take us very long at all to get ready for a night out.

Our make-up was minimal. Blue eyeshadow, black eyeliner, and a touch of cream blush. Sometimes a bit of lip shiner. That’s all we needed. None of this contouring and fake eyebrows.

We spent more time on our hair than we did on our faces. Perms needed attention. Gel on the roots and loads of hairspray to get those curls sitting as high as possible.

You strutted off to the disco; your friend wearing her luminous pink jacket, while you were going through your phase of bleach streaked denim, pinned with metal badges.

When you walked through the double doors, cigarette smoke and the scent of Panache and Impulse filled your senses. On one side of the hall, the boys sat on long wooden seats and the girls mingled in their little groups on the opposite side.

Jaws moved nineteen to the dozen as they chewed on Wrigley’s spearmint gum. Fresh breath was of the utmost importance when the chance of the shift with your crush was on the cards.

Image Courtesy of Victoria Borodinova

Courage didn’t come from alcohol or recreational drugs in 1981—it came from your friends. You encouraged each other and you looked after each other. You danced together, you went to the toilets together, and you went home together.

When a lad asked you to dance, it was manners to accept. When you were only interested in one dance, you said thank you at the end of the song and you left the dance floor. It was important not to look at his face because if you were in any way soft, you might feel sorry for him with his sad expression and end up staying with him for the rest of the night out of pity. So the rule was; don’t look him in the eye.

But if you liked him, by all means look into his eyes and stay with him ‘till home time.  

Often you had to wait until the slow set to get asked out for a dance. The lights would dim as Ultravox filled the air with Vienna, and you prayed to all the saints in Heaven that your crush would ask you out to dance. Your world fell apart as you watched him taking some other girl out instead. Bridie! It was always Bridie who got to dance with your fella!

Then, the lad who had yet to discover deodorant strutted towards you.

‘Aw, God…please don’t let him come near me,’ you mumbled under your breath. But as Vienna vibrated every ditch from Cavan to Donegal, God hadn’t a hope of hearing your prayers.

The poor chap approached with a red face and a shaky voice. ‘D’wanna dance?’

Sure you couldn’t refuse. (Mammy said it was bad manners to refuse) And Bridie was clinging tight to your crush so you had nothing to lose anyway.

His hot breath in your ear, his father’s Old Spice snaking up your nostrils, trying to convince you that this lad was a great catch!

But Status Quo put an end to the slow set and to the galloping beat of What You’re Proposing, you unleashed yourself from Bucko’s clutches and whipped out your air guitar. With your big perm swinging from side to side, Bucko slowly retreated back to his seat!

Your friends surrounded you and you all had a great night.  

Aw…they just don’t do discos like they used to!

Lucy’s drawing today.

Our Friend From Spain #SoCs

The prompt for Linda G Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday (#SoCS) is ‘Trip’. Use it any way you’d like. Part one.

We had a Spanish exchange student staying with us last year from the end of August until mid-December. It was a wonderful experience for our family, especially Little Miss Ten. She and Alicia got on so well together.

Lucy struggled to settle back into school after lockdown and suffered from low confidence and a little bit of anxiety.

This was the reason why we decided to accept an exchange student. Not so that they’d be firm friends, but to have another young person in the house, getting up for school each morning, coming home full of tales—some of woe, some of wow—and then sitting down to do homework.

Lucy’s three siblings are independent young adults who live about three hours away, so she’s a lot like an only child. Don’t feel sorry for her—it has its perks!

Our plan went much better than we expected. From the first day, Alicia and Lucy connected. Her English was excellent too. And she could do a great Cork accent. “Me nerves George…me nerves.”

As the days went on, Lucy became more like her old self. Funny, talkative and confident. Alicia was kind to Lucy and spent a lot of quality time with her. They had lots of chats and Alicia listened to all Lucy’s little concerns. She advised her, she told her about her own struggles of being a 14-year-old teenager. She talked about her dreams and ambitions. Thank goodness Alicia has realistic goals and appealing dreams.

Last week in school, Lucy had to draw a picture of a person who inspires her. I was so happy that she drew Alicia.

Alicia was very honest. She said it as it was! This turned out to be a good thing because we all knew where we stood with each other. We had one or two very minor issues, but once we mastered the task of keeping the lines of communication running smoothly, everyone was happy.

She was tidy, reliable, trustworthy and she ate everything she was given. A lot of it! We joked a lot about how much food a small person could eat.

‘Where do you put it?’ Stephano would ask. ‘How do you stay thin?’

‘Genetics Stephan.’

She had a good answer for everything.

It was great that she ate well because I must admit, the food was the one thing I worried about. Teens can be fussy eaters at the best of times, and in a foreign country, it could be a problem.

We cried when Alicia was leaving. We missed her so much. Her smiles, her upbeat attitude and her chats. But that was not the last we heard from her. She calls Lucy a lot, we chat on WhatsApp.

And the best thing of all—we’re taking a trip to Santander where Alicia is from. We will stay for four nights and visit Alicia and her family while we’re there. We’re all very excited.

Alicia gave me permission to use her image on my blog.

Alicia told us some very important news a couple of days ago. About a special trip her dad is taking. You can read all about that HERE in part two of #SoCS